You Listen : Research from The Diary Reader

::Part of that Godly wisdom I told you about a few days ago.::

My friends are brilliant.

One friend of equally non distinct ethnicity as me, the Diary Reader, I’ll call her, is married to one of the pastors. He’s also kind of prophetic.

So it took me a little off guard when,  a few weeks ago, she mentions, “Me and {her husband} talked about you and Hoyt and we approve.” Because they aren’t ones to say words lightly and, well, when a {their last name} tells you something, you better listen.

Anyway that was weeks, a month, whatever ago and then recently I was over watching the kids and she asked “So what’s the latest update?” But there wasn’t one. Until the next day when we ended up on the phone (Hoyt and I) for the first time in a month and I find myself ELATED to talk to him. I missed him so much! So I write the Diary Reader and ask her “is this okay? What do you think? Can we be friends?” She knew the whole story and, like I said, she’s a teacher and chock full of wisdom so I really wanted her input. Which I am just going to copy on here because it was GREAT. Hope it helps you too.

I’ve been thinking about the whole Hoyt and you dating thing and I was wanting to just ask if you’d thought about it from this perspective:

– The Lord has led Hoyt to tell you that he has feelings for you and he has expressed that.  Now, the decision that remains before you is whether or not you can submit to Hoyt in this leading.  If you trust that the Lord has been working in Hoyt and leading him in this way and that you can both trust God’s leading of him and desire to submit to him – then date the man.  But, if you cannot submit to him in this decision – then don’t date him.  I don’t know – I sort of think that accepting the decision to date is sort of like the first act of submission.  And in submission, often the Lord tells the guy something and then he tells you – and then you follow rather than you personally getting the lightning bolt message from God – you’re still getting the message from God, but He is working through the man.  I’m not an expert on this or anything, but I know that I did a lot of agonizing over whether or not I was going to date {husband}.  I prayed and prayed and told {husband} that I didn’t know and made him wait forever – and in the end, I was like – yeah, I should date him – and {husband} was like – yeah, the Lord already told me that, I’ve just been waiting on you – what took so long?  The Lord had put it in {husband}’s heart to pursue me and marry me and I fought a lot along the way – and did some damage in the process.  So, I definitely say pray and I definitely say read your Bible and do all those things – but you have already been doing those things up until now – so it’s not as if the Lord isn’t leading you step by step every day.  And He has led you into this close relationship that you have with Hoyt- so why would it be a curve ball for His will to be for y’all to date?  Looking back, I think it’s so funny that I didn’t see how the Lord had been working in mine and {husband}’s friendship and building this trust and this respect and all of that – and then I tried to fight the dating.

Now, obviously, I’m me and you’re you so this might not all work the same way for you that it did for me – but I just wanted to throw in part of my story in case you’re stuck in the same place that I was.


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