A Long, Long Time ago, I wrote about the Recovery Program I went through at my church. It’s a program that works at Christ-centered recovery from hurts, hangups, and stomething else starting with an H that I can’t recall. In the interest of telling a story, but not more details than necessary, here are some of the things (but not all) that you can be “In recovery” for (or, as you’ll see, recovered from!)
Anxiety Abuse Adultery Abortion Anger
Drug addiction (Legal or Illegal) Disordered Eating
Ho (being one)
Inadequacy (feelings of) Identity Issues Idolatry
Masturbation Malice Manipulation
Q c’mon. What starts with Q?
Smoking Shame Sexual Addiction Spending Slander Self Harm
Tongue – sins thereof TV -addiction to
I realize that some of these may seem like a cop out. Pride? Doesn’t everyone have pride? Yes, and some may war against it every day and find each day that they my turn their heads and hearts back to Jesus.
And some may not.
So Recovery is a place you go to, a program you try, whatever the proper way is to say it (I care but I just don’t know) when “You recongize that your hurts, hangups, and that other word have gotten out of control.”
I started recovery after I had a MAJOR MAJOR anxiety attack 17 months ago and a friend came over and read the Bible to me. It was the first time I was ever able to “come back” frpm an attack rather than cry myself to passing out.
So I realized it was out of hand, I just never knew there was anything I could do about it.
Approximately five minutes into recovery, I realized I had another major issue. Anxiety proved easier to kick. Maybe because I saw NO benefit from being anxious. But this other issue, it was tougher. It was an addiction, you might call it, based on the DESIRE I had for this issue. Some hangups sort of “happen” to you. You have to learn how to fight against them happening, but usually you’re fighting outside sources. And some hangups are because of the things you pursue. You don’t have to fight them happening to you, you have to fight yourself from going after them.
No, I’m not going to tell you what it was. Could be anything up there. Could be not on that list. The point is
Now unfortunately, I’m not what you might call a poster child for the “steps.” I made it all the way through the step study but for issues that had nothing to do with the program and everything to do with inter relational snafus, I never really went back to meetings after. My sponsor eventually had to sever our relationship of going through the steps, (not out of anger, just out on inability to continue) and so I only went through step five of the personal steps.
(Which is a tough stop to leave, at best)
But the real moral of this story is:
the hard habit/hangup/other h word to kick. the one that tortured me. the one i had to give up over and over again, the I would cry and confess and lose sleep and lose joy over,
Today I celebrate ONE WHOLE YEAR of recovery from it. And it’s just such a miracle it needed to be said.
Thank you Jesus.