Perception: Blogging about Dudes

Let’s start out with a story.

Not too long ago, a friend was applying for jobs. Like we do. She found one that particularly suited her, at the same business where she’d already worked as an office aide for several years. She has a degree in the field she was pursuing and though she’s still learning and growing, pursuing further education, she was well qualified.

She was denied even the opportunity to interview because a senior exec in the small company, who had seen her work in the office, kitchen, and mail room, thought she was too silly and flippant for the very professional and polished position for which she applied.

My friend was F.U.R.I.O.U.S. She knew she could do the job, and do it well, and felt it was unfair to have been judged based on her previous behavior which was, albeit silly, perfect for the job she’d had at the time.  She knew that she’d have to be very different in her knew role, but also knew she’d was more than capable of the change.

Ultimately it didn’t matter how ticked or capapble she was. She’d spent two years being just one person in the eyes of those in charge. Almost a caricature, in fact. In retrospect, she learned two very important lessons:

1. Though you can’t live your life based on it, you should acknowledge that people are watching and paying attention and

2. You are the only person who can and is going to work actively to change the perception of you that others have.

Now, she’s learned to be a bit more guarded. Honestly, the selfish part of me hates that because she was/is a hoot and I don’t like seeing her at work or church and getting the toned down version of her. But I have reluctantly admitted that as I pursue a professional career in counseling, I have to do the same.

I have to acknowledge that people DO form ideas and judgement based on the information available. And often, I am the one who makes that information available.

I am the one who picks my clothes, thus giving others an idea of who I am and what is important to me. If I look like a slob all the time, it doesn’t matter how well i CAN clean up, people will think I’m a slob.

If I’m a loud crazy banshee who won’t ever be still, why would anyone think I can responsibly handle  a client in a counseling room quietly or with grace?

Or relating to the title up there, if I blog about dudes a lot, people are often going to think I’m dating them.

So….why do I blog about dudes? Stay tuned.


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